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Catwoman - The Blog
#1
Just for a hoot:

12:45 Just finished vacuuming. Dee Dee's in Reno. It's too hot to sit outside so I'll kill a couple hours with a DVD. Catwoman is here from NetFlix. that'll do. Start 'er up.

12:46 Have my laptop open to keep track of the shuttle launch. oops - postponed till tomorrow. Now what? I know - I'll do a running commentary of the movie! So far it's just Halle being worried about her job.

1:00 Halle Berry finally dies and gets breathed on by a badly animated CGI cat.

1:17 Halle appears in costume (Julie Newmar looked batter). She's basically in a black leather coat and tiny mask. She beats up some jewel thieves.

1:18 Batman crashes through the window and tries to stop her. Not really, but that would have happened if I was directing.

1:30 Halle Berry is really attractive. The movie is rambling but at least it has Halle in it. I don't find Angelina Jolie attractive at all, she looks too 'plastic', so the Tomb Raider movies just kind of sucked. Also Angelina has a limited range. Halle can do 'Monster's Ball' and 'Gothika'

OK - I just endured some really BAD CGI Halle jumping around some iron beams for no reason. This led her to a nightclub where she fights with some guy. Lots of kitten-with-a-whip action.

1:43 Halle Berry pushes an old lady down the stairs. Apparently that doesn't hurt because the old lady gets up and makes nice with Halle. Halle goes to a theater and tries to reenact Batman Forever. This movie is really bad.

2:03 Halle Berry is still attractive. Her costume is now a leather brassiere and short pants. I will watch the whole thing, dammit. She's been framed for kiling her old boss. The REAL Catwoman would have killed her own boss without blinking and published pictures on the internet.

That's the problem with Hollywood and 'anti-heroes' . Hollywood wants morality and due process. Anti-Heroes are vigilantes and anarchists. You behave in an anti-social manner and you're dead.

2:06 - Halle is fighting Sharon Stone. Apparently Sharon uses a face cream that makes her invincible. I'm not kidding

2:09 - Time to pull out the 'give me your hand' cliiche.

2:12 - It's over. Not surfe what happened or what was resolved. Halle Bery stays attractive..
[Image: magpie13.gif]
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#2
I'm pretty sure that as far as guys go, the only point was Halle Berry in the costumes.

For the chicks, there was no point at all, because in addition to the inanity of the so-called plot, we had to put up with watching Benjamin Bratt as a "love interest." To me, that was more ridiculous and far-fetched than the face cream that makes you invincible.

Sigh.
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
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#3
I thought for sure you'd mention "Egyptian Cream" since the song predates the film by years.
the hands that guide me are invisible
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#4
Actually, ED, that is quite a service you just provided. You just saved me nearly two hours and you were both entertaining AND informative. You could do the same thing with some other films if you want to.

How about the new Superman...?
In the Tudor Period, Fencing Masters were classified in the Vagrancy Laws along with Actors, Gypsys, Vagabonds, Sturdy Rogues, and the owners of performing bears.
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#5
The only reason DM might consider seeing that was for the Stone vs. Berry cat fight. Was that any good? It's all about the fight scenes.

Excellent review ED!
Shadow boxing the apocalypse
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