I'm more broken than you

[cranefly]

Thanks?

Is that forever on the leg crossing or only until they've healed?

The web has a lot to say about that.  If you filter out all the unprofessional opinions and just go with what the orthopedists and surgeons say, well, they all disagree.  It's stunning.  Some say it depends on the entry incision, where anterior is best -- according to some.  Some even say there's no restrictions whatsoever from the get-go.  Others favor posterior or lateral, but with different opinions on precautions.  In a nutshell, I don't know, and it's very annoying.

I think my surgeon suggested I would be fine doing martial arts moves that are sane.  He did point out that yoga has some pretzel postures that put unnatural stress on the hips and ought not be done.

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I'm going to back off on these TMI posts "real soon now."
But not quite yet.  So assume the position, forbidden to me for now (and maybe ever).

So yesterday as follow-up I go in to see the nurse, and she has me hit the restroom, and I have a good void.  And I'm hopeful.  If I'm under 350 ml retention, I'm in the clear.  Otherwise, catheterization.

So the nurse lubricates my tummy and does the ultrasound, and I still have 550 ml in me.  WTF!  Not even close.  So the nurse tells me I need to be catheterized.  But then she throws me a curve.  If I don't want a bag, I can learn to catheterize myself.  Is that really a thing?  Well, yes it is.  She gives me a pamphlet and leaves me alone to read it, and by the time she comes back I'm convinced.  Yeah, let's do this.  What swayed me was the idyllic photo on the pamphlet cover of the mature lady sitting under a rose bush smelling a rose and smiling like she was in nirvanna.  So the nurse provides a tube and lubricant and walks me through the process, and though it takes a while, because I'm a bit tentative with the entry, finally I struck oil.  The gusher produces the 550 ml she had seen.

I did it!  All by myself.  I'm so proud of myself.  She didn't even have to hold my penis.

So now I got a bunch of tubes, and lube, and I'll be doing this 4 times a day for the foreseeable future.  At least until the surgery 4 to 6 weeks out.