my mom

[Drunk Monk]

I guess I'm just weird.

As if that’s news to any of us.

I’m not afraid of dying. It’s the suffering. A long time ago when I was having suicidal thoughts I made myself this vow that I would only do that by seppuku. That takes commitment, and I’ve never been anywhere near that committed.

I’ve been pretty depressed about all this today. That’s an artifact of having a degree in psych - self-diagnosis. This morning I could barely get out of bed or eat. It was my telecommute day and I spent most of it wallowing.

The next three days will be a lot of work. Hopefully it’ll keep me distracted.

Did I mention I fell asleep at a stoplight last week? Came out of nowhere. So burnt out.