Doom Dogs

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

I don't have kids. I have dogs. So, I don't get to write down their cute witticisms. That doesn't stop me from talking about their cute actions.

Take today for instance. Preston has gotten it into his head that he doesn't like to walk in the morning, especially if it has rained. He doesn't like to walk around the Radio tower for fear, I think, of getting his paws muddy. He also doesn't like it when Cuchulain and I go on the walk without him. It's the Queen's new alarm O'clock.

It rained yesterday. Preston was hiding. I didn't want to play the find Preston and urge him to walk game. We left. Preston barked the entire time we were gone.

The reason we walk was so they can pee and poop. When I returned with the very well behaved Cuchulain, I took Preston for a quick jaunt around the circle. Cuchulain is the good dog. He comes when you call him. He doesn't need the leash, because he doesn't go far. At least not for me. Preston would be gone in a second and no amount of bribery or talking would bring him back until he was ready to return.

We set off with Preston on the leash and Cuchulain off the leash. Done it plenty of times.

I experienced the worst panic I have felt in quite some time this morning. What caused this panic? I saw the skunk a millisecond after Cuchulain spotted. Turns out Cuchulain is a dog. Dog's like to chase things that move. The skunk was moving just fine for him. I guess he never got the pamphlets about skunk defensive mechanisms. He also went deaf at this time because I was screaming my brains out to make him stop as Cuchulain darted up the street towards the black and white rodent.

Fresh skunk was a completely new experience for me. It has a slightly different taste than old skunk scent. And it's like hot sauce. At first you don't think it's there and then it burst into flames.

Eventually, the skunk headed off into the bushes where the brown dog could not follow. But the damage had been done.

Thank god 7-11's are open twenty-four hours a day. Cindi went out first to get some hydrogen peroxide, but couldn't find any at the closes store. I stayed in the yard with a very mournful Cuchulain. He didn't understand why I wouldn't let him into the house nor would I allow him to rub up against me. For some strange reason, Preston wanted to rub against Cuchulain. Stupid dogs.

I washed Cuchulain down with a mixture of Hydrogen Peroxide and Baking Soda that the Queen had heard about . And what does a dog do when he's wet? He shakes himself. Skunk smelling Hydrogen Peroxide went everywhere especially onto the person applying the mixture. We then went to the shower for more shaking and more smelling.

I have had bad Mondays but this one has to go down into the books.

[El Dingo]

Ahhh...sweet, sweet schadenfreude!

Also - "Monday's" is not possessive so no need for the apostrophe.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Who didn't know what Schadenfreude meant?

[cranefly]

Hey, I'm a writer. This is my stock and trade.

Still, my hand is way up. But it's fuzzed out, because I'm not a Boston terrorist.

Bay Area is another thing....

[The Queen]

...to know what Shadenfreude means. I was expecting a funny link, not a definition. Sheesh!

[Drunk Monk]

mine german nine es too gudt.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

I weep for the past because so many of us are condemned to repeat it.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Farts and Runs. or Scared by Farts.

I don't know what is causing this phenomena but you know the bad smell is coming when Preston abruptly arises and scampers around the room. He looks very perplexed by what occurred and doesn't believe it came from him. It's kind of a Doom trait.

[Drunk Monk]

Walter the Farting Dog series (with Glenn Murray & illustrations by Audrey Colman)

* Walter the Farting Dog (2001) ISBN 1-583-94053-7 (Some versions come with a bonus stuffed animal of Walter that "farts" when you squeeze it)
* Walter the Farting Dog: Trouble at the Yard Sale (2004) ISBN 0-525-47217-7 (this book has also been released as Walter the Farting Dog Farts Again)
* Rough Weather Ahead for Walter the Farting Dog (2005) ISBN 0-525-47218-5
* Walter the Farting Dog goes on a Cruise (2006) ISBN 0-525-47714-4
* Walter The Farting Dog: Banned From the Beach (June 21, 2007) ISBN 0-525-47812-4 (co-written with Elizabeth Gundy)

Walter the Farting Dog (Latin)

* Walter, Canis Inflatus (2004) ISBN 1-583-94110-X

[Drunk Monk]

The pom got skunked twice. Once mildly, while we were away. Again badly last Saturday at around 4 in the morning. I tried the baking soda peroxide mix recommended by the groomer the first time with arguable results. I tried a skunk shampoo product yesterday which worked fabulously. Poms are all fur. It's like a skunk smell sponge.

At least it masks the smell of my medicine...

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Was the dog at home or with you when he was skunked? If it was at home without you, how did that happen. You don't seem to live in an area conducive to skunks.

Have you pulled your first tick off the dog? That's an exciting treat, too. I had to do that last night with farts and runs. He lay down on the floor next to the bed. When I petted him, I felt a rather large lump under his chin. There is nothing like removing ticks at 11pm at night. They creep me out and they are hard to crush.

[Drunk Monk]

our area is lousy with skunks. we're in walking distance of coyote hills and don edwards parks, as well as a huge slough that crosses all of our horseshoe-shaped city. there's always dead skunks in the road near my work and home. always.

[thatguy]

I had to do that last night with farts and runs.

You, or the dog?

--tg

[The Queen]

The dog runs away from the fart, smart enough to get away from the stench.
The man stays where he is and assigns blame to the nearest dog.

The Queen suffers, mostly in silence.

[Drunk Monk]

...until now.

we hear your plight, oh queen. take comfort in the knowledge that the dreaded glynch flatulence blamed on innocent dogs pales in comparison to the fluffy light farts of the mighty ppfy, especially after a hulk burger. god save the queen.