my mom

[Drunk Monk]

I heard from the supplier. The bed and wheelchair are to be delivered to the new home tomorrow. 

That's a relief. Hope it comes to pass. The one thing this experience has shown me is how unreliable medical bureaucracy can be.

[Drunk Monk]

The wheelchair and hospital bed were delivered. 

I’ve spent the whole morning filling out forms. This thread was very helpful in getting some dates straight for past hospitalizations. Thanks again Greg.

Tomorrow, I move her from rehab to the senior care home. Hoping it goes smoothly.

[Greg]

Is the senior care home permanent or do you hope to get her back to her own home?

[Drunk Monk]

I hope she might be able to return home but it’s unlikely. Her fall risk is too extreme.

[Greg]

Sigh.

[Drunk Monk]

Ironic that this is Mother's Day. I've been working on my mom's stuff all day - so much paperwork - so much to coordinate. I facetimed her earlier and Stacy stopped by. I think everything is ready for tomorrow. I hope so.

The healthcare facility lost her clothes. I know they were there because I remember placing them on a shelf. No big. I planned to swing by her house and get some more clothes for her anyway. She only wears sweat pants and sweat shirts nowadays, and most a pretty ragged. 

I've been working today too to build up a pad for next week's responsibilities.  I usually listen to the radio during that but I couldn't because all my usual stations were playing Mother's Day tributes. Couldn't even take my usual social media breaks because so much Mother's Day postings. It was just bugging me.

[King Bob]

My mom came back from the rehab facility wearing someone else's clothes, so I guess that's how it goes sometimes.

Does she realize she might not go home? That would be a tough one.

[Drunk Monk]

Does she realize she might not go home? That would be a tough one.

she knows. she’s somewhat resigned to that probability…

Was that a situation with your mom?

That’s crazy about your mom’s clothes.

[King Bob]

With my mom, one big issue was that in-home care was gradually eating away at her savings. Since she was in good health, it was a worry for the long term. I knew we'd need to sell the house for her to be set for the long term. Fortunately, one day she said she needed to move. We were ready and got it done quickly.

[Drunk Monk]

Yes, the savings eating away... I feel ya.

It's the most macabre hourglass ever. My mom has some savings, which will get us a years worth at this facility. After that, we'll tap into her stocks. That's a few more years, unless the market crashes. She did well in 2021, so much so that she paid a crapton in taxes. Then there's the house. Gonna have to sell it someday. Cleaning it will be a beyotch, not as bad as Lynch Manor, but we've had this house for 50 years now and it's packed tight with stuff, including a ton of mine.

The transfer went ok. MYHC gave us the boot pretty damn quick. Wasn't happy with how that went, but I didn't linger. I hope I never have to see that place again. Ever. 

My mom liked the new place. She was warmly welcomed by staff and started chatting with some of the other residents right away. She liked that there was a lot of flowers and it's well kept. Things are falling into place there. I like the manager and staff. They're surely putting on a good face, but the care to patient ratio is great - 5 patients, 4 staff at dinner. My mom got a bit flustered and started nitpicking on me, which I cannot abide by right now, but that's my own issue really. 

I'll go back tomorrow. Still a lot to put in place.

[Greg]

Sounds good. Fingers crossed it continues to work for you and your mom.

[Drunk Monk]

My mom seems to have settled in okay so far. There's four other ladies, all Chinese but speak English. One was blind and mostly deaf. My mom says that one is conversational, the others not so much. 

The caretakers are all Filipino. My parents lived in the Philippines after the war when my dad served as an engineer working on surveillance radar at Clark AF base. The caretakers had some issues with my mom's name until they realized that it's akin to the word for 'warm' in Tagalog. 

I've been running around like crazy getting her there yesterday and getting everything sorted for her.  Today, she was obsessing over the home delivery Library books and me cutting some carnations that I brought her in a very specific way (she studied Ikebana for years - the art of zen flower arranging). I couldn't take her nitpicking and had to leave. Sometimes that just drives me nuts. 

I won't go back until next week. I think she's good there. We're paying so much money so I hope she's taking care of well for that price. They seem very on top of things, which is reassuring that we're getting our money's worth.

[King Bob]

DM - for future reference - the way we did the housecleaning was to go through and get everything we wanted, then we hired junk hauling people to take the rest of it away. It made it a lot easier. Maybe we could have gotten Goodwill or someone to take some of the furniture, but most of it was too old and worn, so it didn't seem worth the trouble. There were a couple of things I regret not taking, but they're only minor regrets.

Glad your mom is getting settled. I'm sure you'll have rough spots, but having quality care eases some of the worries.

[Drunk Monk]

Hiring a junk removal service seems like a plan. Was it expensive?

My parents have a few nice pieces of furniture including a long wood cabinet maybe 10ft+ Filled with dishes. I have no idea how to even move that. Most of the living room stuff is nice and in great shape. They also have some crap furniture - my dad used to sublet an apartment that he furnished with stuff he got from some hotel resale. But that’s an issue for some future day…

[King Bob]

Maybe 2-3K for the cleanup? I can't remember. We used an independent hauling guy recommended by our realtor. If you go with 1-800-Got-Junk it's way more expensive. (We used them to clear out her room when she died.)