I'm more broken than you

[King Bob]

It's scabbing up now. It's a dry scab, so I can send it to you in an envelope.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Sell it. That's what Ebay is all about.

Say , it looks like Christ on the Cross and you could make a mint. Shatner sold a kidney stone and made 59k for gosh sake's

[King Bob]

Wouldn't Shatner's kidney stone (or any Shatner by-product for that matter) be hazardous medical waste?

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Or at least the article from Mr. Shatner's own website.

Getting Stoned

[Drunk Monk]

Send the scab to the PPFY. He's the king meat eater of DOOM. He might enjoy it with some honey mustard sauce.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Every year it gets harder and harder to reach. It doesn't help that someone put gravel in my knee while I slept. I'm sure it used to bend a lot easier. It would also help if I had my glasses on so I could read what I typed.

[cranefly]

Huey Lewis is looking at me.
Everywhere I turn, there he is, staring.
I'm in the hearing center getting my hearing aids checked. And I'm wondering. Has Huey Lewis made more money as a musician or as a poster boy for hearing loss?
http://www.audiologyonline.com/news/news...ws_id=2221

Just an observation. That's all I do these days. Observe.

I'm in the vet clinic. Geek, our 18-year-old cat, needs a checkup. Actually he needs a complete overhaul, but that's not possible with organic entities, if I recall correctly. Anyway, as I'm staring across the room, it occurs to me that the urinosexual system of a cat is a dead ringer for the starship Enterprise. Sorry, can't find a picture on the web, so you'll have to trust me on this.

I'm flipping radio stations in my Prius and stumble upon "All the Ducks Are Swimming in the Water." If I recall correctly, here's the lyrics:
===============
All the ducks are swimming in the water
All the ducks are swimming in the water
All the ducks are swimming in the water
All the ducks are swimming in the water

Chorus:
All the ducks are swimming in the water
All the ducks are swimming in the water
All the ducks are swimming in the water
All the ducks are swimming in the water
===============
It's been playing in my head for 3 days now, no sign of let-up.

School let out early yesterday. Or at least something weird was going on. All these schoolchildren swarmed the neighborhood. Maybe 20 of them congregated in the intersection just outside my house. I saw pretty quickly that two of the boys were going to rumble. Young, full of adrenalin, and they had an audience. Let me name them Big and Small. Big came at Small, who ducked low, then lifted and dropped Big hard and awkward on his side. Small jumped on Big with a flurry of punches. I headed for the front door, because this was straight out of MMA, and Small definitely had training. But just then a school bus pulled up to the stop sign and the driver blared his horn, causing all the kids to flee eastward down the street.
I'm not certain what I could have done if I'd gotten out there. Yelled at them, made them move along just like the bus driver did. But then they'd just rumble on another corner. That's what I was still thinking 10 minutes later when a Paramedic truck went flying past with the siren blaring.
Kids.

I'm going to close my eyes now and stop observing for a while.

All the ducks are swimming in the water.
All the ducks are swimming in the water.
...

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

May I recommend that you

A) Start taking some drugs, or
B) Take some more, possibly different, drugs.

May it all work out for you, duck song and all.

[Greg_phpbb3_import1]

Are both knees supposed to bend the same amount? Or should one have a superior range of motion while the other seems to be locked in place?

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Jeebus, G.Jr.! What is with you? One is s'posed to be filled with gravel and only move when it is not convenient, the other should be missing altogether.

[Drunk Monk]

It started before Mother's Day - a weird crick in my neck and these wicked migraine headaches in my lower left occipital lobe. Then I caught pink eye, which really sucked - first time I've ever had that. I was totally paranoid about giving it to my family. Woke up every morning with my eyes glued shut with dried excretion pus. My left eye came out of focus. And the headaches got worse, perhaps a side of the sulfa eyedrops. But the drops did there job and soon my eyes weren't so bad. My left eye, which used to be my strongest, is still a bit fuzzy in the morning, and I have to get the checked as soon as I get the chance. The pain in the neck has continued, along with the headaches, and after a battery of x-rays and tests, I'm on mild prescription painkillers and muscle relaxants. They're running out. I'm doing these exercises too. Now it's past Father's Day, and I'm also scheduled for a cholesterol test because in one of my appointments, my blood pressure was really high. I won't be able to get in for that until July. Been getting some body work and had a hot tub and steam room yesterday, but litttle improvement has occured. I'm stil functional. I can still practice Shaolin, although after last week's session, my neck felt like crap. My schedule won't allow me any practice for the next two weeks, so I'm only doing some qigong just to keep moving.

Now my neck sounds like frying bacon when I turn my head. I have picked up this odd tic because I have to crack my neck a lot to relieve the tension build up. It's unpleasant. The headache builds, and I crack my neck and it goes away. Sometimes I'm cracking my neck repeated every ten seconds or so. It's exacerbating my tinnitus something fierce. Makes it tough to concentrate, tough to hear what people are saying. Plus the muscle relaxants makes me sleepy - it didn't at first, but it seems to have a cumulative effect. I'm getting all of these pain referals and body compensations now, since it's been so long. I'm also having these mild hallucinations, illusory motion in my peripherals, which makes me think that there's a bug or a poltergeist nearby.

The weird thing is that I have no idea how it started. One day, I just got this pain in the neck. I wish it would go away now.

[El Dingo]

"Nice Weather for Ducks" by Lemon Jelly.

I really like these guys. I would have put it on a Doom collection but it's so pleasant and mellow it didn't quite fit.

They played Lemon Jelly's 'Elements' as filler music before The Fratellis came on at The Police show.

Lemon Jelly.

El Dingo says steal their music.

Sorry about your neck DM. Can't Legbone fix you?

[Drunk Monk]

...but there's no way he's sticking any needles in me. there's too much water under the bridge. he remembers past offences in our friendship, as do i.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Sorry to hear about the neck/head/eyes, DM. You getting any chiropractic? TMJ, perhaps?

For me, my "partial ACL tear" went to "torn ACL" a couple weeks back. Now I'm in the full "Mad Max" knee brace when I'm teaching. See the Doc in a couple of weeks and will contemplate surgery.

[Drunk Monk]

The X-rays show arthritis. What a pain in the neck....