My job is not so bad...

[Drunk Monk]

I gotta hand that one to GM Tu. Every once in a while, he still blows my mind, which is saying a lot because my mind is pretty blown already - little more than a smoking crater left now. But GM Tu is a true Daoist shaman, complete with moments of magic.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

It's a big ol' universe. I know less every day.

[Drunk Monk]

Tu is a powerful one for sure. I've tried to capture him in dozen or more articles but he always overwhelms my 2-3K word limit. Greg tried to do a doc but Tu just didn't get exclusivity. He reduced most of DOOM to dead weight to tow with his manhood, leaving our two biggest brothers, Yeti & the Bone, to be starters blocks. And we won't even get into his progeny.

Graduate school trained me to be a skeptic but he restores my faith in magic.

Here's the print: https://www.instagram.com/p/BN0E3TWAnMr/

Gonna frame it for sure.

[Drunk Monk]

For the last two days, I was immersed in The Belt and Road China Tai Chi Culture Tour.  It went astonishingly well and was surprisingly enjoyable.  It was strangely escapist, given my present situation.  I befriended one of the crew rather early by giving him a lighter (fortunately I had just bought some lighters for my glove compartment and he had his taken at the Beijing airport).  The grandmasters all recognized me, which was always delightful, and I met a new grandmaster who was fascinating and extraordinary.  Of course, now it piled a crap-ton of work on my desk for the next few weeks.

[Drunk Monk]

Today - right now in fact - I am sitting on my veranda and transcribe the interview I did with Daniel Wu last week.  

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Blue skies, ocean breezes, birds singing.

I am grateful.

[Greg]

Sand fleas.

Have you reclaimed Skittles, yet? And when you go after Skittles are you chasing the rainbow?

[Drunk Monk]

No new flea bites last night.  It's a seasonal thing - this weird burst of fleas.  Plus we vacuumed repeatedly and washed all the linens.  And I soaked myself in repellant.  

We've decided that Skittles is Mary's cat, our neighbor who feeds every critter in the backyard.  She even hires our former neighbor to come over and feed all the critters while she's away.  

But neither of these are relevant to work. I finished transcribing about an hour ago and I'm still on the veranda because it's so nice today. I just had some homemade nachos.  Life is good.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

I’m very happy to read that, DM.

[King Bob]

Nachos at 1:44 am?

[Drunk Monk]

I got schooled in staff combat today by Master Ma Wenguo. He’s one of those amazing Kung Fu renaissance dudes - a college professor, tcm doc, calligrapher, actor, traditional Chinese opera performer - master of so many skills of which I’d be happy to master one. And he speaks English okay. A Shaolin monk friend tipped me to ask about Mad Demon staff - a classic Shaolin form. I don’t know it but I know the subsidiary Yin hand staff (both are from a precedent treatise). My staff skills are competent - I’m no master but I can hold my own still - I’m a Shaolin disciple after all.  Man, this guy could move - blindingly fast and precise - and tremendous striking power. He was a police combat instructor too. He started showing me stuff and it got crazy. He caught me on my left pointer finger by accident - apologized immediately. I didn’t think much of it but now it’s swollen with a pin point red bruise ON THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF MY FINGER FROM WHERE HE HIT ME like some kind of weird mystic Qi strike. Sometimes that happens but I still trip out when I see it because it defies my medical understanding. Cool dude. I was racing to keep up with what he was saying and doing. He’s just a few years younger than me (I do relish when masters misjudge my age). And now his daughter is getting her masters at our Alma mater SJSU, so we’ll surely see more of him. 

Inspirational skills and wisdom. Honored to bear witness. Nothing like being in the presence of real Kung Fu. These are the perks.

[Drunk Monk]

Random observation of Master Ma that I just remembered - he was wearing a rasta bracelet.  It was a hemp red, green & gold strung piece, with a black oval ornament that had a distorted pot leaf engraved into it.  Of course, I asked.  He said it was just for fun - something that came with a lion shirt that he had recently acquired that he was rather fond of - he likes lions.  I mentioned that it was Jamaican but it went past everyone in the room.  Due to the oval shape of the ornament, the pot leave didn't look so pot-like.  I thought about saying 'zhege shi mafi' which is slang for 'this is cannabis' (as if any of you would be impressed that I can say that in Mandarin) but didn't.  He has no idea.

It reminds me of two similar occasions.  Master Meng was wearing a dress shirt at our 25th that had Tiger Rose embroidered on it (the descending tiger set in mother-of-pearl on Jerry's guitar).  I asked him if he knew what it was. He had no idea.  He liked it because it was a white tiger and that had some symbolic meaning for him.  I told him what it meant and to not be surprised if he got solicited for drugs while wearing it. He thought that was hilarious.

I used to use a butt pack with a Lion of Judah symbol set in a red, green & gold Star of David. Master Painter, who is this huge cowboy combat trainer for the Texas Rangers (the cops not the baseball team), saw it and said that he liked my 'Israeli Military' patch.  He had no idea.  I told him it as actually Ethiopian, but I'm not sure he knows where that is.

[Drunk Monk]

A few weeks ago, I was running out of tea.  Mind you, the Shaolin monks have spoiled me with high grade Chinese tea.  Wrecked me is more like it.  Tea is a Chan (zen) practice in China, so there's some monks who really know their tea.

Just before I went to FL, Coach Pei gifted me some PRC Embassy tea, complete with a cool canvas book bag, but I'm worried that I carry it around, I'll get deported.  It's really good tea though - really good - in individually vacuum-packed packets.  Each packet lasts me a week. 

Last week, Master Ma gave me some tea.  It came in a plastic yellow box (tea boxes are sometimes better than the tea but this one is sorta lame).  That tea is okay.  

I just got a new container of tea from Master Long.  He wants me to write a piece on one of his coaches to help with his visa app.  I haven't opened it yet.  Came with some cookies and pineapple cakes, which I'll probably send to Tara, and a reusable shopping bag with his school logo.  

I'm rolling in tea now.

Not as cool as some of the Scotch the Maestro gets, but these are the perks.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Pineapple cakes are goooooood.

[King Bob]

I was thinking the same thing. When I worked in Cupertino, I used to go over to the bakery at Vallco Village to get them.

[Drunk Monk]

We get a lot of pineapple cakes.  It's largely a Taiwanese thing and the bulk of our Mandarin-speaking staff are Taiwanese, so when they go on vacation back to the motherland, they bring back pineapple cakes.  I really should avoid sweets, but I'll usually indulge in one when they come through.  They're small and shouldn't mess with my blood sugar too badly.