Mercury in Retrograde

[thatguy]

Delaying a pleasant lunch is exactly the sort of thing that mere would mess with...

No soup for you!


--tg

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Delaying a pleasant lunch is exactly the sort of thing that mere would mess with...

What's a "mere"?

Oh, man, that typo is sooooooo Merc-in-Ret! Doom, Despair, & Agony on thee! Deep, dark depression, excessive misery! If it weren't for Merc/ret you'd have no luck at all! Doom, Despair, & Agony on thee!

[King Bob]

A plague on both your houses.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

A plague on both your houses.

!!!!!

It's mercury-filled tardigrades for you, Mister!

[Drunk Monk]

Today got off to a rough start. 

On the good side, Tara secured an amazing summer job/internship with Orrick, a major law firm voted No. 16 on Fortune’s 2024 list of the best workplaces in the United States. She will be making more money there than I have ever made. We are so proud.

However, that jammed up a yoga retreat in Hawaii that Stacy was planning. Tara has to come back early from that to start the new job and getting a new flight back proved to be a supreme hassle. As she was telling me this, I got notified about a major error I caused on the YMAA website and had to scramble to get it fixed. It was totally my fault and demanded immediate attention. I managed to fix it but all this morning chaos jammed our chance to go to yoga this morning.

---

And now hail? srsly? 

My weather app says partly cloudy.

[Drunk Monk]

I only have room for one weapons rack in our bungalow. It’s a nice gun rack upon which I store two fav swords - my custom dao from Hong Kong and my jian from Lam Sifu. One of the nails pulled out randomly yesterday. Fixing it my be troublesome because there isn’t much real estate for a new position and it tore our the drywall. 

Stacy has been having trouble with the sauna heater. It hasn’t turned on for her. I can turn it on but for some reason, she can’t.

[King Bob]

Drywall fix? Sounds like a job for the G-Man! How can you entice him?

[Greg]

DM already turned in his help me chit for this month.

[Drunk Monk]

help me chit 

Sounds like the chorus of a mariachi song.

[Drunk Monk]

Eclipse edition 
Bottles threw up in darth. Then I hit my head so hard on the overhang from the roof over our dryer that I had to sit down afterwards and check my scalp to see if I was bleeding.

[King Bob]

Small scalp cuts from hitting my head are my specialty. I do it a lot. My spatial awareness apparently has a blank spot where my head is going.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

My excuse for always wearing a beanie is that I’m bald and my head gets cold. The truth is that it offers protection from my many head-bumpings

[Drunk Monk]

There's a bruise and a scab. 

A small one. 

I only notice if I poke at it. 

Like I did just now...

There's this beautiful bouganvilla tree in our front yard. It shifted during the rains. Thought it might fall over. I've hit my head on that fucking branch so many goddam times in my decade plus of living there. You'd think I'd learn. But now it leans more. That tree feckn owns me.

[Greg]

One word: pruning.

[Drunk Monk]

That tree would only reach out to me more. It's out to get me.