It's the cheese

[Drunk Monk]

[King Bob]

[Drunk Monk]

Cheese Protects You From All Causes Of Death, Says Science

 SECRET NYC • AUGUST 17, 2021



‘What do we say to the God of Death?’ Nothing – just offer him some cheese!
A big dzięki to our friends in Poland: namely Professor Maciej Banach of the University of Łódź. For Banach and his plucky team of researchers have just completed a thrilling meta-analysis of 29 cohort studies that confirm what we’ve always chosen to believe: cheese can help you not die.
Thus spoke the scientists: ‘cheese and yogurt were found to protect against both total mortality — death from any cause — and mortality from cerebrovascular causes.’

Verily, it is the shield that can protect us against the slings and arrows of modern life, including stroke and heart attack, according to the European Society of Cardiology, which presented the research.
Studying over 20,000 adults over 11 years, consumption of this food was associated with an 8% lower total mortality risk. Not bad, not bad at all.
So frolic in the traffic, run with scissors, play with matches: defy death and all his minions by simply slathering yourself with melted cheese. (Don’t drink too much milk though, as that was found to have the opposite effect. Mystifying, isn’t it?)

[King Bob]

All causes except choking on cheese.

[Drunk Monk]

choking on cheese.

Either that’s a euphemism for something naughty or a great band name…

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

Choking on Cheese was the debut album for the albino Kurdish band Kurds/Whey

[Greg]

It's my way or the Kurds/Whey, as my father used to say.

[Dr. Ivor Yeti]

If the Kurds had their Way, we wouldn’t be letting them get slaughtered every few decades.

[King Bob]

We have a friend who brings us cheese curds when she visits Wisconsin. They are tasty! But her grandparents are dead now, so that probably means no more curds for us.

[thatguy]

You're poutine me on with all this talk about kurds...



--tg

[Drunk Monk]

[Drunk Monk]

[Drunk Monk]

[Drunk Monk]

[thatguy]

Cheese Cake?

--tg